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It wasn’t just the work wearing me out…

09 Feb

I  hadn’t slept well in weeks because my right arm is killing me. It feels like someone has my arm on a rack and they are pulling it apart. That’s what it feels like.

But then when I started throwing up blood, I now get what she was trying to tell me.

RA can attack soft tissues as well as joints and I have no stomach lining left. I told you the name does not describe the disease.

I am already swallowing a small pharmacy of stomach medicines but she added one more to try to stop it. Blood really burns. It just does.

I took the new stuff last night and I made changes to my bed to make it softer so that if I rolled over, it wouldn’t wake me up. I did finally get some sleep last night. I needed to just take a day off today from everything.

I had been trying to control the whole thing with diet, which is pointless. It’s not really a stomach problem just like it’s not really an elbow or wrist injury. It’s your body attacking itself. Back in 2015 it was my left elbow back then. It took 4 months to get it into remission. But RA is symmetrical, so now it’s the right arm.

Someone I know was asking about me creating a piece of artwork for an office building in Palm Beach. I’m wondering if that hand would be good enough to do it right now. It will take me at least a month to get into a specialist and then a month for them to obtain the old records and then at least 3 more months of a new treatment before we’ll have control of it again. That’s just reality. So I may put off artwork requests for a while. We’ll see. I am calling to get an appointment with the specialist this week. I have to. I am crying “uncle.” I can’t take it.

I am such a really hard worker and I work at such a fast pace that I think those things combined together and I’m feeling it now. This stuff comes in cycles. I just have to get control of it. But until then, all acidic foods are coming out of the diet until then.

I tried to hold off as long as I possibly could. Hopefully, we’ll only have to do a treatment for 3 or 4 months.

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